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Building relationships is crucial to advance your career, yet many women cringe just hearing the word “networking”. It conjures up images of awkward cocktail hours, exchanging business cards with strangers, or sending impersonal LinkedIn messages that go unanswered. But what if networking could feel authentic, natural, and even enjoyable?
In this post, I’ll unpack why relationships are essential for advancing your career, how to shift your mindset about networking, and actionable steps to start building meaningful connections. If networking has ever felt sleazy or intimidating, this is for you.
Why Relationships Matter in Your Career
Let’s start with a hard truth: Your qualifications alone won’t get you that promotion or next-level role. It’s often the relationships you’ve built that open doors to new opportunities. In fact, data shows that people referred for roles are 80 times more likely to get hired than those who apply cold. Why? Because hiring decisions are based on trust, and trust stems from relationships.
Relationships act as your invisible resume.
A strong network gives you access to hidden opportunities, advocates who vouch for your abilities, and mentors who guide your growth. Whether you’re looking for a promotion within your current organization or transitioning to a new field, relationships make the process smoother and more successful.
My Networking Story: From Counselor to Professor
When I transitioned from being a counselor to a professor, I was terrified. Academia felt like uncharted territory, especially the daunting research component. But I knew one thing: Relationships were key.
At a national conference, I decided to step out of my comfort zone. Dressed in my bright coral leather jacket (a color that stood out against a sea of black suits), I walked into meetings as my authentic self. That jacket became a symbol of confidence and individuality. It wasn’t just about the clothes — it was about showing up as me.
Through those conference connections, I landed a tenure-track role that shaped my career for the next seven years. If I hadn’t built those relationships, my CV would have been just another name on a piece of paper. Networking made me a living, breathing person — someone people wanted to work with.
The Mindset Shift: Networking Is Relationship-Building
If networking feels cringe-worthy, it’s likely because you’ve been taught to lead with an ask rather than a connection. Authentic networking isn’t about “selling” yourself or begging for favors. It’s about building mutually beneficial relationships.
Here’s the mindset shift:
- You’re not bothering people. Most people enjoy talking about themselves and their work. Your curiosity can make them feel valued.
- Networking isn’t about asking for help. It’s about starting conversations and learning from others.
- Relationships are built over time. It’s not about a single meeting or message. Authentic connections are nurtured through consistent, meaningful interactions.
The One-to-One Rule
One strategy I teach my clients is the One-to-One Rule: For every job you apply to, talk to at least one person at that company. Here’s why it works:
- Visibility: People hire people they know and trust. Talking to someone at the company can put your name at the top of the list.
- Insights: Conversations with insiders provide valuable information about the role and culture, helping you tailor your application.
- Advocacy: When someone at the company vouches for you, it dramatically increases your chances of landing the job.
Overcoming Common Networking Struggles
There are three barriers I often hear from my clients when it’s time to network to advance their careers:
- “I don’t want to feel pushy.” Networking isn’t pushy when done authentically. Start by asking questions about the person’s role, their career journey, or their organization. People appreciate genuine interest.
- “Networking events feel exhausting.” Networking doesn’t have to happen at big events. Coffee chats, LinkedIn messages, or even casual conversations can be just as effective. Introverts often thrive in one-on-one settings.
- “I don’t know how to stay in touch.” Build relationships by nurturing them. Send a quick email with an article or resource you think they’d find interesting. Update them on your career progress. Authentic connections are maintained over time.
Networking with Faith and Confidence
Networking isn’t just about effort; it’s also about trusting God to open the right doors. Proverbs 27:17 says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” Building relationships is about mutual growth and support, not self-promotion.
When you combine practical strategies with faith, networking becomes less about striving and more about trusting that God will connect you with the right people at the right time.
Practical Steps to Start Networking Today
- Clarify Your Goals: Know the role or promotion you’re aiming for.
- Identify Potential Connections: Use LinkedIn, your organization, or industry events to find people in relevant roles.
- Start Small: Reach out with a genuine question or compliment about their work.
- Use the CONNECT Networking System: Build relationships naturally by focusing on conversations, not asks.
- Keep a Networking Journal: Track who you’ve spoken to and follow up every few months.
Ready to Take Your Networking to the Next Level?
If you’re ready to build relationships that lead to your next-level role, my one-on-one coaching partnership, Next Level Career, is here to help. When we work together, you’ll learn my CONNECT Networking System — a step-by-step framework for building genuine relationships that open doors to high-level opportunities.
Click here to apply and start your journey to a higher-paying, higher-impact role.
Networking doesn’t have to feel awkward or sleazy. It’s about showing up authentically, nurturing relationships, and trusting that the right opportunities will come your way.
Start building your invisible resume today, and watch how God uses your connections to advance your career.
